We carry on

Babs RARELY txts.

A chaplain at a busy hospital and mother of 2 grown kids, she only txts when she wants to ...which is just this side of never. She's aloof like that. (By the time a woman hits 50, she learns to guard her time & attention.)

I don't really know what possessed her to send me a txt recommending that I watch the video for "Welcome To the Black Parade," by My Chemical Romance. (again, this chaplain & mom is in her 50s, so... how is she listening to something that just reeks of goth/emo?)

Drawing out the suspense, I was stuck all week with a computer that refused to play video. So, the txt remained on my phone, as a reminder to check out that song... eventually.

In the meantime, another week passed. Another chuck out of another year.

And once again, I've found myself face to face with June 18th... the night everything changed.

It's been 13yrs since the accident. 13 yrs since things ended for Shelley. June 18th, 1997 is the moment that cuts my life into a "before" and "after."

I never know how to observe this day. Mostly, I just want something... a moment... that feels like I've honored her life, the toughness of going on after that, and something that provides a little boost of hope or sense of mission to propel me into the future.

And, today, I was at a loss.

Until I remembered that txt.

Which lead me to this.

On June 18th.








When I was a young boy,
My father took me into the city
To see a marching band.

He said, "Son when you grow up,
would you be the savior of the broken,
the beaten and the damned?"
He said "Will you defeat them,
your demons, and all the non-believers,
the plans that they have made?"
"Because one day I'll leave you,
A phantom to lead you in the summer,
To join The Black Parade."

When I was a young boy,
My father took me into the city
To see a marching band.
He said, "Son when you grow up,
would you be the savior of the broken,
the beaten and the damned?"

Sometimes I get the feeling she's watching over me.
And other times I feel like I should go.
And through it all, the rise and fall, the bodies in the streets.
And when you're gone we want you all to know.

We'll carry on,
We'll carry on
And though you're dead and gone believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And in my heart I can't contain it
The anthem won't explain it.

A world that sends you reeling from decimated dreams
Your misery and hate will kill us all.
So paint it black and take it back
Let's shout it loud and clear
Defiant to the end we hear the call

To carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're dead and gone believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're broken and defeated
Your weary widow marches

On and on we carry through the fears
Ooh oh ohhhh
Disappointed faces of your peers
Ooh oh ohhhh
Take a look at me cause I could not care at all

Do or die, you'll never make me
Because the world will never take my heart
Go and try, you'll never break me
We want it all, we wanna play this part
I won't explain or say I'm sorry
I'm unashamed, I'm gonna show my scar
Give a cheer for all the broken
Listen here, because it's who we are
I'm just a man, I'm not a hero
Just a boy, who had to sing this song
I'm just a man, I'm not a hero
I! don't! care!

We'll carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're dead and gone believe me
Your memory will carry on
We'll carry on
And though you're broken and defeated
Your weary widow marches on

Do or die, you'll never make me
Because the world will never take my heart
Go and try, you'll never break me
We want it all, we wanna play this part (We'll carry on)

Do or die, you'll never make me (We'll carry on)
Because the world will never take my heart (We'll carry on)
Go and try, you'll never break me (We'll carry)
We want it all, we wanna play this part (We'll carry on)